And thus it seems, this is my life now. I'm drinking wine tonight, wine following margaritas (Sunday), which followed more wine (Saturday). But, really, I'm doing well. Life like sandpaper, that's all. I'm getting smoother? cleaner? more refined? through the process.
I like it. The way things seem to be hitting me in the face, good and bad, lately. Gotten so I'm a little mixed up, and I laugh at the bad ones. Splash! Experiences like waves, and me, soaked - in, under, tossed, riding. Through it all, I've been thinking.
Tonight I realized that nothing has changed. It has been four months since we even said hello, and NOTHING HAS CHANGED. And I guess that's good to know, that nothing's changed.
It was good, no? We loved each other. I'm sorry I fell out of love sooner. I'm sorry my fuse is longer, I'm sorry I dreamt in directions that took me away from what you dreamt of for us. I'm selfish. You said it. (In the car, no? It was raining?)