Sunday, December 9, 2007

le job, la vie, le vin (misspelled)

As the pace of activity increases, does the pace of innovation/learning/creativity decrease?

I just finished the design of a home page for a website, but it looks a whole lot like another website I designed once, except it has this other element pulled from a different website I designed, combined with another trick, and with maybe one trick I've never done before.

The first web site I made was really bad, but everything was new, so it was completely innovative, I learned a lot, and felt extremely creative. Now that I'm making web stuff more often, I repeat what I know - not quite so innovative, not quite so creative. Yet partly necessary to get things done in a timely manner.

My hope is that I also learn something new with each project I do. Try something new.

If I were to expand on this thought, what if each day was a time to, not only repeat and refine, but try something new?

I would like my professional activity to be a mini-experimentation ground in which to closely examine the stuff of life.

(I've been drinking wine tonight, by myself, sitting in my bed, listening to internet radio and working on this website. Maybe that's sad, but I don't care, I don't care at all, because I like wine, I'm well over the legal drinking age, and now I'm not nearly as anxious about having to buy everyone presents as I was an hour ago.)

Thursday, December 6, 2007

as is

Some events.

A camera crew came, set up in the alleyway outside my apartment, and proceeded to film a commercial in my neighbor's garage. For what I don't know.

It rained a lot today, and I went grocery shopping. I bought pumpkin bagels, which I am really excited about. I also bought two salty snack foods and no sugary snack foods. I thought it would be a good step. Then my roommate made chocolate chip cookies and that was the end of the reducing-sugar-intake thought. Gah.

I am currently dealing with several men who are children, and as there are not that many men in my life, it's making me wonder: are all men children? However, as one who has just confessed to losing all resolve to a (lot of) warm fresh-baked cookie(s), perhaps I am not one to talk.

A thought from tonight's shower : sometimes we have to overcome incredible obstacles to get what we want. Othertimes we must give up what we want because the obstacles are too huge. And then there are the times we are too scared to go for what we want and let the obstacles loom like nighttime shadows on the wall.

Gah. Scratch that. Currently, I hate metaphor. Give it to me like it is, Chuck. That's all I can take.

In another world, Chuck does, and says exactly what I've been waiting to hear.

Back in this world, I am preparing for a month of insane grant-writing by trying to get a leg up on it now. I am dancing around old ideas (ones I'd be well over in that other world). Without exaggeration, almost ever single muscle in the left side of my body is tight. There are a good number of dirty dishes in the sink, and I am out of laundry detergent.